The other woman in his life

Dear Betsy,IS it possible for a man to love two women at the same time?

My husband has just admitted he is in love with a work colleague but also still loves me too.

He reassures me that one will not affect the other, but I cannot understand this. We have been married for three years, have no children, both have busy successful careers and I thought we were happy.

I am not sure how to handle this. Can I believe him or should I put my foot down and insist he gives up this other love before it takes over?

I know that some Muslim women accept this situation, when their husband marries another lady, but as a Roman Catholic, I cannot accept it and don't know what to do. Please help Betsy.

DMJ

Dear DMJ,

The phrase "having his cake and eating it comes to mind".

You could confront the other lady, you could consult your priest or you could call his bluff and tell him to take a hike.

Ultimately, you must preserve your self-respect at all costs. If you don't then it is highly likely that you will find yourself in a marriage with three people ... famous prophetic words and I don't know many marriages that could recover from such a potentially mortal wound.

If you feel pressurised then ask him to leave while you consider your position carefully.

Removing creature comforts and laying down some severe house rules can reap huge rewards in this type of situation.

You deserve happiness and fidelity, and if your husband can't offer you that then maybe you need to rethink your life goals.

Dear Betsy,

Help, I threw out your water article with the list of foods high in water content! We have been following it for a while now and feel better so can you please reprint the list of foods for us?

Also, what natural remedy do you recommend for irritable bowel syndrome?

Lorna D.

Dear Lorna,

Here is the list of foods again. As for irritable bowel syndrome, there are several things that may help you. Of course, it is important that you consult your doctor, (if you haven't already) to make sure this is a correct diagnosis.

Different foods can trigger this condition, as can stress. I recommend always sitting down to eat, even if it is only an apple, and chewing slowly and methodically.

Common 'trigger foods' can include anything with wheat in it, such as breads, cakes, cookies, pasta etc. Wheat is in the most unusual things, such as mustard and soy sauce, so check labels carefully.

Dairy products such as milk, ice cream, cheese can also be upsetting for some tummies as can lots of refined sugar in sweets, candies, chocolate.

Fizzy drinks such as cola and lemonade drinks can add to that bloated uncomfortable effect.

A cup of warm peppermint herbal tea or camomile tea can help as can sipping a room temperature glass of soda water, don't gulp it.

A tummy rub with some camomile, peppermint and lavender oils can help your digestive system relax.

Drinking enough water, eight glasses a day or more, can also help your body to process foods and maintain its equilibrium more efficiently.

I would also recommend yoga or pilates to help you relax and improve your posture.

A warm compress on your tummy such as a hot water bottle can also alleviate some of the discomfort.

I have a client who swears by a tablespoonful of gripe water - a solution usually reserved for babies.

Food Percentage

of water

content

Tomatoes, courgettes, romain

lettuce, watercress 95%

Asparagus, broccoli, spinach,

strawberries, mushrooms,orange juice,

watermelon, grapefruit, sweet peppers 90%

Yoghurt, pineapple, kiwi, pears, apple,

blueberries, raspberries 85%

Grapes, cottage cheese, cherries 80%

Prawns, bananas, ricotta cheese,

avocados, tuna in brine 75%

Hammour, long grain white rice, baked

potatoes 70%

Pasta, skinless chicken 65%

Ice cream, salmon steak, chick peas,

beef steak 60%

Mozzarella cheese, (low fat) grilled

burger (lean) 50%

Cheddar and swiss cheese, white and

brown bread 35%

Breakfast cereals, popcorn 5%

Dear Betsy,

What kitchen ingredients can I use to make a natural body peeling to remove my hard dead skin?

Cheela.

Dear Cheela,

Try mixing together a large handful of sugar, three tablespoons of olive oil and the juice of a freshly-squeezed lemon.

I recommend standing up in the bath or shower and apply the scrub to dry skin using vigorous circular rubbing movements.

Rinse off with a warm shower and immediately apply a nourishing body lotion.

Not only will this remove hard skin, it will moisturise your skin and brighten and lighten your skin colour, leaving you dewy and glowing.

This works for all you guys out there too! For a more macho scrub try substituting rough sea salt for the sugar.

BETSY SAYS RELAX

Rediscover a favourite family activity and get out and do it this weekend.

Quality family time can be difficult to schedule. Even if it is just getting everyone around the same table for a relaxing meal.

IF ONLY YOU DO ONE THING THIS WEEK

Take a break and go see the Mamma Mia (Seef Cineplex). Even if you are not a die hard Abba fan, you are sure to be touched by the feel-good-factor of this movie and the obvious enjoyment of the cast is infectious. I totally disagree with GulfWeekly's film critic this week.

Apart from that it is so refreshing to see leading actresses like Meryl Streep and Julie Walters proudly flaunting their crow's feet without resorting to the comfort blanket of the soft focus lens. Their true beauty and vitality shines through regardless. If there is a low point in the movie, then for me it has to be trying to get my head around 007 singing (I am being kind) to Meryl Streep!