Hubby's snoring make me mad

Dear Betsy, I am sure you hear this everyday but I am a true fan of yours. Something about your columns makes me feel like I know you personally.

Your care and warmth to people is commendable. I usually do not idolise or praise people unless they are absolutely worthy of it.

So keep up the good work and thank you for being YOU. Also, I wonder why your column is just one page, it should take up a few more, considering the number letters you may be getting and the good advice you are sharing. I can assure you that you have enough avid followers to justify.

Anyway, my problem is spouse snoring. I have been married for 10 years now and I have a wonderful husband and a lovely six-year-old. He has recently started snoring through the night which is becoming extremely uncomfortable for both of us.

I shamelessly discussed this with a few of my girl-friends (including a doctor), who have said that they have the same problem.

However, no one offered a solution. I looked up on Google for discussions and cures.

The only logical one I read was to use Aromatherapy - Marjoram at night in a diffuser. I tried that too but it just isn't good enough.

I barely get any sleep, disrupted with constant waking throughout the night. Once I am up, I try to quieten him, which wakes him up too and leaves both of us blaming each other, with NO sleep.

No need to mention the after effects of this; anger when the alarm rings at 5am, tiredness all day, no smile on the face, uncomfortable looks at each other etc ... Later in the day our child wonders why we are so lethargic and edgy.

How can I resolve this? My husband also talked to his best friend who said that his wife sleeps in the next room now as she can't stand his snoring! His friend had got some kind of operation done on his nose and throat to stop him snoring, which has obviously not worked.

I am getting another bed in the living room organised for myself but should it come down to this? We are ready to try anything. Please help!

DM.

Dear DM,

Thank you for your lovely kind comments it is good to know that you enjoy reading GulfWeekly.

Your problem is an interesting one and although it is the butt of many jokes, it really can result in serious health issues for those concerned.

There are many old wives tales about 'curing' snoring, including putting a tennis ball under the snorers mattress, having him drink beetroot juice at bedtimes, abstain from drinking alcohol before bed and not eating wheat/dairy and other mucous-forming foods.

Some of these may work for some individuals and for other couples, just sleeping in a well-ventilated room and using a fairly low pillow seems to help.

Marjoram oil may also work, it is quite soporiphic and can help open the air passage to ease breathing. You could also try putting marjoram, eucalyptus and lavander together on a tissue and popping it inside your husband's pillowcase.

Pharmacies sell various throat sprays that claim to help prevent snoring and for some sufferers, using a band-aid type nose strip commonly used when you have a cold and a blocked stuffy nose, seems to be effective.

They work by keeping your nostrils apart to help prevent snoring.

Resorting to medical intervention may be the last resort for some, but it does not always bring the desired results, as in the case of your friend.

Many doctors recommend the snorer to lose weight, even as little as five or six pounds have been shown to help and in lots of cases, has proven more effective than surgery. This may be an option open to your husband.

Sleeping apart has its attractions when neither of you have been able to sleep and sleep deprivation, apart from making you feel cranky, can be downright dangerous as it reduces your powers of focus and concentration and even your responses and ability to carry out simple everyday tasks such as driving safely.

Sleeping apart from your spouse on a long-term basis is not without its risks. I personally believe this is a special time for couples where the skin on skin contact of sleeping together can produce bonding hormones that keep your relationship strong and healthy.

Some couples find that although the snoring is driving them crazy, they can't get used to sleeping alone and find their sleep patterns are disturbed in any case.

I would recommend trying a combination of the above and varying it until you find what works for you both. Have you tried using earplugs?

Sometimes the simplest remedies are the best.

If any of our readers have any suggestions or would like to share how they coped with a snoring partner, then email me please.