I am 16 and fed up of being skinny

Dear Betsy,
I am a 16-year-old girl with a few issues that are eating away my confidence.

I have a month to get healthy and look good the natural way, before getting back to school. I have very thin hair and because of this I have never had my hair length below my shoulders.
I am 16 and just 42 kilos; I need some flesh on me. This is my last year in school yet students call me skinny-donkey, bag of bones etc.
I am sick of being thin and I have dark circles so whenever (like my friends) I try and apply eyeliner it never looks good.
Please help me gain my confidence. I want to grow up to be healthy. Please suggest ways of achieving my goal.
Thanks in advance,
Elaine

Dear Elaine,
It is not easy being a woman and especially more so when you are 16, as at this age you are very susceptible to both self criticism and criticism from your peers. 
Girls usually want to look and dress the same at this age and sadly, many women never grow out of this phase and develop their own unique “look”.
There is no need for you to wear eyeliner just because your friends do, or have long hair just because they do or be a certain weight or build just because they are. 
You need to focus on doing what looks and feels best for YOU.
Recognizing your strengths and weaknesses and learning how to make the most of yourself is the most important advice I can give you, and this is going to help you throughout life, not just the next school year. 
I believe that real beauty is the inner confidence that comes from knowing you are making the very best of yourself.
 Let’s start with your hair. Many girls cannot grow their hair long. This can be due to many reasons, and is not the end of the world as long hair does mean a lot of work and it does not suit everyone.
Falling hair is natural for everyone as dead hairs have to fall out as new hairs grow in.
I know it can be scary to look down and see lots of hairs in the shower when you wash your hair, or embedded in your hair brush, but it is quite normal to lose around 100 hairs a day, so relax. 
If your hair is fine textured and you are a slim 42 kilos, then depending on your face shape, a neat precision ‘bob’ or a short wispy boyish cut, could work well for you.
Consult several hairdressers before deciding on a new style.
Your hair style is important but more important is the condition of your hair, so make sure you use a good quality shampoo, rinse well, apply a suitable conditioner then use sweet water for the final rinse.  Protecting your hair from harmful ultra violet rays and the harsh effects of the heat, humidity and air-conditioning are also important.
These days you can buy a ‘moisturiser’ for your hair that you apply every morning to your dry hair to protect and nourish it.
L’Oreal salons have a wide range of products for this purpose. Keep your style neat by having a trim every four to six weeks.
At least once a week, leave your hair to dry naturally to discourage split ends.
Let’s talk now about your weight and the fact school idiots are calling you unkind skinny names.
Did it ever occur to you that they might be jealous of your figure? Many girls would love to be as slim as you.
It may be that this is the correct weight for your height and age and this is something you can check with your doctor or with your PE teacher at school, or you can weigh and measure yourself and check on the internet where there are many sites that have height/weight ratio information.
If this is your correct weight then you can try to give your body more of a rounded shape by following a weight training programme at the gym.
You must have a professional training programme designed for you to ensure your safety and best results. Find a gym that you feel comfortable in and staff that you trust.
If you need to put weight on then usually a well balanced, high carbohydrate diet will help you.
This does not mean eating junk food all day and neglecting your nutritional needs. 
You may just have a high metabolism which means your body burns fuel (food) very efficiently, meaning you stay lean.
In this case, don’t fight it and learn how to dress to flatter. 
Your figure is perfect for wearing all those styles and fabrics that larger girls have to avoid like the plague. You need to wear skirts and trousers with lots of gathers and pleats that originate at the waist (rather than the hip).
Choose fabrics with large patterns and designs, horizontal stripes are good, paler colours rather than dark, shiny fabrics rather than matte.
 Tops and blouses can be cap sleeved, puff sleeved, bow necked, round necked, high necked, (not V necks) and with narrow belts. Dresses can be long and floaty with lots of fabric or waisted and full skirted. You can wear those round-toed ballet pumps and pretty flip flops and choose small handbags to compliment your look.
Dark shadows under your eyes can be due to many factors: hereditary, poor nutrition, dehydration, lack of sleep, etc.
Try drinking more water, and use a good camouflage cream like Touché Éclat by Yves Saint Laurent, which is easy to use and won’t look caked.
The secret to a good camouflage is using just enough, and leaning forward into your mirror to see exactly where the dark area is and to apply it sparingly and blend well.
It is best to avoid purple or blue eye liner or shadows as this can make dark circles look worse.
Try a smudge of warm brown pencil under your lower lashes and use a neutral off white on your eyelids with very fine line of darker brown or black on your upper eye lid, so close to your lashes that you are actually applying it on top of the lashes also.
Use a warm peach or coral blusher on the apple of your cheeks to bring warmth and lessen the dark shadows.
Brush your blusher very lightly over the bridge of your nose to again add warmth and brighten the whites of your eyes.
Blusher should be used VERY sparingly, so that it appears you are not wearing any.
 I hope these tips help you Elaine but please remember that the most important thing you can learn is to truly be an individual, and do what makes you look and feel good.
Lack of confidence strikes women of all ages no matter how pretty or intelligent they are, so try my secret confidence booster.
Every morning look at yourself in the mirror and repeat my BICHS mantra: tell yourself you are Beautiful, Intelligent, Charismatic, Healthy and Successful and you will be!
 You have to believe in yourself and telling yourself how fab you are over and over again means you will believe it and have more confidence in yourself and this will show in everything you do.
Lastly, my final piece of advice is to wear a dazzling smile, always, as this will convince everyone what a beautiful person you are.
Those school mates will be so busy trying to close their dropped jaws and believe their eyes that they won’t be able to call you names.
I will expect another letter from you soon asking me how to cope with jealousy!