Escaping the vicious cycle

The thing about life is that it rarely goes the way we once planned. Growing up we've got front row seats to our parents lives - the going to work to pay the bills, taking care of us, taking care of the household chores, going to bed and starting all over again the next day.

We watch it all going on and promise ourselves that when we grow up we're going to do it all differently.

We're going to get jobs that we love and keep us interested, we're going to do fun and exciting things with our lives and we're not going to be anything like our boring old parents when it comes to bringing up our children ... or at least that's the plan.

Then, one day, we catch ourselves talking to our children and the words that come out of our mouth sound all too familiar - in fact, we could be quoting our mother, or father and for that matter, word for word.

Then we realise that instead of waking up every morning excited about going to work and the new challenges a new day will bring, we're simply going through the motions.

The very same motions we've been going through day after week after month, until one day blends into the next and we can't remember the last time we achieved anything other than paying the bills, feeding the children and trying to get enough sleep to do it all again and again ... and again.

In effect, we've turned into our parents just as they turned into theirs.

Rather than living the exciting lives we were all convinced we were going to live, our lives, like those of billions of people over thousands of generations before us just seem to roll by year after year with only a change of location, or company, to differentiate it from year to year.

Isn't it just a part of life that we should just accept and deal with? Yes. If we're happy enough the way things are going, why not?

It's not anyone's place to tell us that our lives aren't living up to their full potential and there's nothing wrong with being happy with what we've got.

Equally, there's nothing wrong with looking around the bottom of the rut for some wood and a few nails to build a ladder of our own.

Just because we have responsibilities to take care of and children to look after, doesn't mean we're not entitled to enjoy ourselves in the process.

Getting out of a rut doesn't mean quitting your job and running off to live in a commune somewhere or abandoning your family to go and climb Mount Kilimanjaro.

It just simply means introducing something into your life that gives you true pleasure.

The first step is to recognise that it's OK not to be satisfied with what we have.

It could be something as simple as doing something you've never done before but have always liked the idea of.

Even if you can only spare half an hour out of your daily routine, take the time and really enjoy it. And, remember to take it one day at a time. There's no need to plan months in advance. And, if you really can't get rid of that niggling guilt, just look at it from a different perspective: If you're happier, the people around you will be happier too.