Ask Betsy

Dear Betsy,
How to ask my parents to be less strict with me? I am an Asian girl born in Bahrain and my sister (we are 15 and 14 years) and I are not allowed to do anything that our friends can do. 

All we want is to be able to go to the mall and the cinema for some fun. We only study and sleep and my mother says this is how our life must be until marriage. Please help us.
JD and AD

Dear JD and AD,
Your mother is just trying to be a good parent.
She has a set of beliefs that she probably inherited from her parents and which is also probably influenced by your family’s cultural and religious background. Every teenager all over the world has a similar complaint at some time, regardless of how strict, or lenient, their parents may be. I still have the same running battle with my 16-year-old son. It is all about learning to compromise.
The best thing to do is to find a way to show your mother that you can be trusted to behave immaculately and that you and your sister will be safe.  Why not ask her to join you at the cinema? Then go for a stroll around the mall together. Choose to go at a less busy time, such as in the morning. 
Let her see that it is a safe, respectable place and she is more likely to permit you to go there with your sister.
Perhaps you have an older cousin or other relative or trusted family friend who could chaperone you both on these outings?
Your mum loves you and is trying to uphold certain standards and protect your reputations as she has her eye on your futures. You may not understand this now, but you will as you get older and especially when you are married and have a daughter of you own! 
You seem like a very intelligent young woman, so I am sure you will find a way to compromise with you mum! Good luck.
If there are any other teenagers out there who faced the same problem and found a way round it, then please email me and share it with us.

Dear Betsy,
Are you a real person? I have lived here a long time and have never heard of you.
I know some magazines make thing up and use old photographs and pretend names. I do not agree with all the advice you give. I do not think you know our culture.  
B.

Dear B,
Well, I certainly think I am a real person! In fact some people might say I am too real ... Anyone who knows me will tell you I am an “original” (wouldn’t be seen dead in a copy) and unfortunately the Editor wouldn’t let me use an ‘old photo’ (a much younger me) and insisted that our resident, hunky photographer T. Andrew Morton take a new one (much older me). 
As for not knowing your culture, you don’t say what your ethnicity is, so I can’t really comment.
 But I can cook a mean Machbous Ribyaan, speak creative Arabic and don’t get lost in the souk. (Anymore).
It is great that you don’t agree with all my advice, as that’s what a newspaper is all about, sharing opinions and provoking thought and in your case provoking a reader response which surely proves how “real” this all is.  
Thanks for taking the time to write to me and I hope you keep enjoying GulfWeekly.
Dear Betsy
Do I have to brush my teeth at night?
Sheza

Dear Sheza
Of course you do! You should be brushing them in the morning, at night and, if possible, after lunch too. Good dental hygiene is vital to our health as well as our social relationships.
All sorts of nasty things can happen to your teeth and gums if you don’t brush.
Doctors now believe that ultimately, poor dental hygiene can contribute to heart disease, so if the thought of hair-raising halitosis isn’t enough to scare you into brushing and flossing, then maybe the fear of a heart attack will be? 
Make an appointment with a dental hygienist who will educate you on proper oral care.