Daily life of table manners

‘I don’t think that table manners are passé. Since everyone is in plain sight of everyone else, it’s pretty obvious if you slurp your soup or hoard the bread basket. Does anyone enjoy being at a table with a loud mouth or messy eater?”          – Kate Spade

I just love observing people especially during dining. I have been blessed to be exposed to fine dining ever since I was a child.

My parents were simple folks, but it was my aunt who I admire and adore that brought me to all these fine dining places. I knew from the very start that I loved the idea of being able to practice my “fine dining skills.”

As I got older, going out on dates was not all about disco’s and bars. Having to go to a good restaurant was “A  MUST” for me.

Maybe this explains the reason why I ended up training flight attendants in fine dining and proper table manners. So let me share with you some tips I have known for years … which have never really changed in all these times.

The dining table is intended for china, glassware, utensils and linens.

Key chains, lipstick, the mail and children’s toys are best placed elsewhere at mealtime.

As for mentioning lipstick - do not overdo it before dinner as you would not want to see stains on your napkin and on a glass rim.

I tell you that is a NO NO! And such a turnoff! Should you need to retouch, excuse yourself. You can use lip balm … but discreetly please.

When food is not yet served you can rest your arm on the table but the minute that food is there only your wrists are allowed to touch the table. Avoid putting your elbows on the table, never hunch over, or hug your plate while eating.

When you are hosting dinner, make sure that your guests are served first. Food is always passed counter-clockwise. When you feel like yawning immediately excuse yourself or camouflage your fatigue.

When you are asked to pass the salt – pass the pepper as well.

I like preparing finger bowls. These are either bowls with water and lemon or bowls with rose petals. They are greatly used after eating shell fish.

I notice that a lot of waiters do not know when their guests are done – or just pausing – during  a meal.

When the fork tines are down and on the left side of their plate and the knife is on their right side it means they’re not done yet.

However, if the fork and the knife are placed together on a four o’clock position then they are done with their meal.

It’s interesting to see people trying their best to show that they know how to use chopsticks. And in the end making it look like pick-up sticks. Don’t wait for this time to happen and ask for a fork and knife.

Don’t be shy to do so. Or better yet, go to Gulf Hotel’s SATO restaurant – they serve you with trainer chopsticks. That will help make you a pro in using those chop sticks in time.

To cut, or not to cut, your salad? Yes, you can cut your salad. The reason why cutting greens were an issue, it is because blades of knife were made of silver, which interacted with vinegar in the dressing.

But today most flatware are made of stainless steel, therefore cutting your salad is a matter of preference.

When invited for dinner after being seated, wait until your host has joined the table and lifted his or her napkin, then place yours neatly on your lap.

When excusing yourself from the table between courses, place your napkin on your seat or the arm of your chair. If you have an oversize napkin first fold it in half and then place it on your lap.

Before you leave the table and you’re done with your meal, simply rest your napkin on the left side of the place setting. If the plates have been cleared from the table leave the napkin in front of you.

Leaving food on the plate is not a sign of good manners.

But to finish what is on your plate is! Take small portions of everything – overcooked, undercooked and burned are not good reasons to pass up the dish –­ not unless you’re allergic to what is being served.