womanspeak

Womanspeak is a female-to-male dictionary, aimed at enlightening the male population on what a woman means when she says…

‘The joke’s on you lads’
A little joke/story this week that might make you husbands appreciate your wives a little bit more:
A husband arrives home from work one day to find the front door wide open and the hall floor littered with toys and sweet wrappers.
Thinking this is a little unusual, he calls out for his wife and when he doesn’t get an answer, walks into the kitchen.
Looking around he notices the sink is overflowing with dirty dishes and that the fridge is wide open with a carton of milk lying on it’s side dripping liquid to the floor and the contents of the fridge half eaten and spilling out all over the place.
Turning around and tripping over more discarded toys, he sees a pan burned dry hissing away at him on the stove and looking over his shoulder he then notices his children running wild in the garden still dressed in their pyjamas and rolling around in the mud.
Worried now, he rushes from one room to another looking for his wife, noting while he does that each room is worse than the previous one and that the house looks as if a tornado has ripped through it.
Reaching the stairs he noticed water running down them and starts to panic, thinking his wife might have had an accident in the bathroom. He leaps up the stairs two at a time and reaches the bathroom to find it empty with the sink tap running and a stopper in the bottom.
By this stage he doesn’t know what to think and is so worried about his wife that his heart is racing fifty-to-the-dozen.
He hears a noise coming from the end of the corridor; he turns and runs down to the master bedroom only to find his wife contentedly sitting up in bed eating chocolate and flicking through a magazine.
Startled, he asks her what in the world she thinks she’s doing? “Every day you come home complaining of a heavy work load and every day you condescendingly ask me what I’ve been doing all day. Well, today, I didn’t do it!”