Girl talk

The subject of young girls and body image is one that keeps repeating in my articles and lectures. But I feel very strongly about it and I try to mention it whenever I can.

FACT: Young girls today are under a lot of pressure to be thin. I've talked to a lot of young girls who seem to be confused when it comes to body image.

They are getting mixed messages from the media, family, friends, school, etc and those messages don't always correlate with what they see in the mirror. Girls today define beauty as 'thin' not as 'healthy'.

I was once approached by a girls' PER teacher at a private school here in Bahrain. This lady teaches exercise to high school girls grades 9-11. What struck me as very interesting is that she called me to help the girls understand more about body and weight.

She said that the girls in her class were always on a 'diet' of some sort and that she was very worried because most of them barely eat.

They're trying to lose weight and they're going about it in completely the wrong way: by starving themselves.

Over time, these girls 'have no energy to do anything, and they were even fainting in class!'

Surely this is a case for concern, not just for parents but also for school managers?

When asked what they think they could do about their weight problems, one girl answered: "I can always get the band". She was referring to the stomach surgery that involves tying the stomach with a band to make it smaller! What happened to the old 'eat well and exercise' approach?

To make my point clearer, I have even seen this weight obsession with my own eyes.

In my earlier lectures and talks to young girls (ages 10-15), almost all of them said they wanted to lose weight.

The ironic part was that - 1) most of them were not overweight to begin with; 2) none of them wanted to lose weight for health (it's either for a party, or for a pair of jeans); and 3) none of them were happy with the way they looked.

A lot of them didn't even know why they wanted to lose weight. They just thought 'thin is prettier' and 'prettier is happier'.

Interestingly enough, some of the young girls even wanted to lose weight 'for their mother'! That may sound very surprising, but parents have a very big influence on their children's body image.

Well-intended comments like 'why are you eating so much' or 'you look fat these days' can have many effects on a young girl who is confused about what to believe.

Some mothers who have struggled with weight themselves, try to protect their daughters from falling into the same trap and try to push them further to be thin.

So if you are a mother (or, if you know a mother) of a young girl, try not to make weight an issue (whether they need to gain or lose it).

The best thing is to lead by example by having a healthy diet and not discussing your own weight issues.

You can even have a 'girl talk' where you discuss the social pressures to be thin and why being healthy is more important.

If you are not sure about the facts, look them up or ask someone who does. The more girls know, the better equipped they will be to face a world of social pressures and conflicting messages.

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